Last time I ordered a pizza from you, you felt the need to ask me how my night was going… I responded something like this:
“It is 10:30, I am drunk, and about to stuff my face with greasy pizza. Obviously I am doing well. Now please leave my stoop until such a time as I summon you again.”
Please do not make the same mistake tonight, or I shall be forced to mock you until tears flow from your bloodshot eyes.
-Sincerely (kind of), Zachary.